Square Dancing Class: The Weirdest of Them All
by the electric phantom
Summary: M. Flower High is forcing its students to take a dance class. Jessica and Keith pick square dancing, but they're in for a surprise. The teacher has crazy beliefs like "Don't talk to brothers!" and "Unmatching socks give you good luck!" Can the class actually manage to not fail and possibly learn something about life, love, and yes, square dancing. Might contain Jeith later on.
1. Chapter 1

Jessica sighed as she slipped into a desk.

"This is going to be a long class, isn't it?" she asked Keith. He didn't respond; he was already asleep.

"Yep. Long class."

For school, they had to sign up for a dance class. The options had been ballet, tap, ballroom, and square dancing. She had picked square dancing because it seemed less awkward (oh, and because she was already great at tap.)

The teacher came in in jean shorts and a patriotic plaid shirt. This should be interesting.

"Keith, wake up!" she muttered.

"How long was I asleep?"

"Fifteen minutes."

"HELLO, EVERYBODY!" the teacher said in a failed attempt at Grover, "I am your teacher, Mr. Dick!" some students snickered. Mr. Dick looked around the room.

"Well, this isn't the right environment for my class; someone's already asleep!"

"Keith, wake up!" Jessica said.

"My homework ate my dog!" he yelled randomly. Several people laughed.

"Keith, wake up!" nothing, "Please?" still nothing, "Look, it's the Wiggles guest starring on _The Muppet Show_!" he woke up.

"Where? I wanna see!" he looked at Jess,"That's just cruel." Mr. Dick cleared his throat awkwardly.

"Yes, well, now that we're all awake, let's introduce ourselves! How about we start with you in the front?"

"I'm Matt," a guy said.

"I'm Alicia," his girlfriend added.

"I'm Jesse," said the guy next to them.

"I'm Marie!" said a blonde girl enthusiastically. Then was the second row.

"I'm Austin."

"Danielle."

"Eva."

"Yo, Michael." Third row.

"I'm Jessica."

"Keith," he said (still only half-awake.)

"Bobby."

"I'm Tiffany!" And the back row was.

"Carl!"

"Vanessa."

"Colin!"

"Katie."

"Okay, so, let's get going! Now, who knows how to do the train dance?" asked Mr. Dick. Jessica, Keith, Bobby, and Marie raised their hands.

"Alright, get moving!"

"Where to?" Keith asked.

"Where do you want to go?" he and Jessica looked at each other like they won the lottery.

"Alright!" they began the train dance (If you do not know this dance, please consult _A Very Potter Musical._)

"Who knows how fast this year's gonna go? Hand me a glass; let the butterbeer flow," they sang, and so on and so forth until they reached The Electric Diner. Everyone sat down.

"Whoa, what's going on?" Hector asked.

"We were bored," Keith said.

"So, you brought your whole class here?"

"Yep, that pretty much sums it up," Jessica said. Hector shook his head.

"How bad was this class?"

"Keith fell asleep," Hector gasped, "Twice."

"Man, I do not envy you guys." Mr. Dick came over.

"Don't talk to strangers!" he said. Jessica stared at him like he was crazy.

"He's my brother!"

"Don't talk to brothers!"

"Okay, fine, Mr. Dick," she said, very annoyed with the whole thing. He left.

"Mr. Dick?" Hector asked, barely suppressing a laugh.

"It's better than those twins we knew that were named after Jell-O."

"Touché."


	2. Chapter 2

**Matt's POV**

Matt sighed as he walked towards square dancing class. It was just so stupid! Aside from the fact that he didn't like dancing (minus kick lines); this guy was just a bad teacher! They'd only had two classes with him so far, and both had been disastrous.

Aside from the first one, with going to The Electric Diner and that guy falling asleep twice, the second one was even worse! Mr. Dick had caught Carl and Marie passing each other notes, and decided that they should sing the song from _Phantom of the Opera_! He'd also freaked out when no one knew the "Men in Tights Rap" by heart, although Jessica was pretty gosh darn close. In other words, no one was exactly looking forward to his third escapade.

When he got there, Alicia and Jesse were in a deep conversation about how Twilight sucks. They often talked about this, simply because it was true. He smiled as they quoted his little sister, Cassie's, first video on YouTube. He himself was very into vlogging and followed Jessica's website constantly (though he never actually talked to her.)

**Michael's POV**

I sat there, you know, man? And I was like, "Whoa, teacher's insane, dude!" and this babe named Jessica was all like,

"Keith, man, wake up, dude!"

And he was all like, "My homework ate my dog, man!"

And Mr. Dick was all like, "Yo, come on! Wake up, man!"

And the babe was all like, "Wake up, man!" but he was still, you know like, sleeping and all, so she started talking about, like, the Muppets, and he was all awake!

**Colin's POV**

Katie and I were talking about dragons when Mr. Dick came in. He started freaking out once he got there. It was actually kind of funny.

"All of you are wearing matching socks!" he gasped.

"And your point is?" asked this guy in the front row (I think his name is Jesse Coded, but I'm not sure.)

"YOU'RE BAD LUCK!" Dick yells. Vanessa starts banging her head against her desk.

"EVERYONE, TRADE A SOCK WITH YOUR NEIGHBOR!"

"Ew, no, that's so unsanitary!" said Alicia.

"Yeah, I'm not trading socks with the guys!" said Tiffany.

"No offense, guys," said Jess, "But your socks smell _nasty!_"

"Oh, come on! It was a joke!" said Keith, who sits next to her in every class I see them in (it's kind of creepy.)

"It was gross!"

"Todd did it!"

"Yeah, but Todd's smelled like chocolate chip cookies!"

"So do I!"

"No, you don't! You smell like either sugar cookies or Old Spice."

"You say that like it's a bad thing!"

"That's what _you _smell like! Your socks still smell like sweaty, gross things!"

"And how would you know?"

"Gym class!"

At this point, no one is doing anything except watch them argue.

"Why don't you guys calm down?" Katie asked them.

"Can I listen to some music?" Jessica asked.

"I'll sing for you!" Mr. Dick offered.

"No thanks."

**A.N.: Alrighty, here's a challenge for you guys. Every character in the classroom is based off of someone. Only three of them are based off of people in my life. My challenge is to see who can figure out who every character is based off of (Jessica and Keith are just based off of themselves.) I either have something linked to them on my profile via the writing, or they're based off of someone in another story. For instance, let's say I had a character based off of somebody in **_**Primeval **_**(I don't), you could find that via LTA. Good luck! May the Push be with you!**


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